The Tale of Derek One-Arm

So, in my first ever campaign as a DM, we had a DNPC named Derek One-Arm. I promised I’d bring his story back in more detail, so here you are. 

One day, they were in the middle of a battle, and I realized that the party balance was a little… off. The biggest problem was we were still using XP leveling rather than milestone (which we were doing because originally we’d been part of an adventurer’s league and that’s how they did it). Some of my players were higher level than others, and so the power of the encounter was impossible to truly balance. I needed strong enough opponents that the higher leveled players wouldn’t steam roll the baddies, and weak enough opponents that the lower level players wouldn’t get frustrated. 

Now, after getting over a decade of experience as a DM, I would have balanced their levels, switched to milestones, and kept following the encounters without too many tweaks to keep things fair. Back then, I figured “Hey, just throw them some reinforcements!” 

Derek came along in the form of a fighter who was going to be exceptionally limited in his abilities to affect the balance of the game. He only had one arm, meaning he couldn’t use two handed weapons, couldn’t use a shield, and while he managed to make a pretty decent meat shield, his damage output was also limited. One of the most memorable fights was probably one of the earliest. He was shooting a two handed crossbow (at disadvantage since he only had one arm) twice in a round. The party couldn’t figure out how he was doing it, until they saw that he was using two crossbows, and just handing them down to some commoners he was protecting to have them reload and pass him a fresh one, allowing him to use his two attacks per round without needing to reload. 

That moment, apparently, made him badass enough to come along and fight with them. He was quiet, introspective, and stoic, but the party loved him. He is still talked about to this day in group conversations. Especially in the moment I had him kidnapped by the Bhallist Monks. There was a whole side mission where the party needed to invade a grove in an underground cavern and rescue him after being kidnapped. This is where the party met the most dangerous mini-boss of the whole campaign: Tonilia, the wood elf monk whose eyes had been carved out of her head (most likely by herself). She stood atop a stripped tree, Derek’s one arm shackled above his head beneath her, and as the party attempted to sneak up on her, even with a natural twenty, she turned her head and looked at them because she had blindsight. 

Such a threat would have made anyone want to turn and run, but the party refused to leave Derek behind, fighting tooth and claw to a draw, where Tonilia pulled back, ready to get her revenge later. They managed to save Derek, losing quite a bit of blood in the process, but they got him home. 

Before there was Luis the Paladin of Nike, there was Tik, the gnomish wizard who loved to fiddle and tinker. Now, this was in the age when the Artificer class was not a thing yet, so gnomish engineering was pretty much the best there was to offer. The party got their hands on an item called the Gauntlets of Ogre strength. Now, these could have been worn by a couple members of the party, though no one was particularly strength based. There was a thought that they could give them to Derek, but I shot down that idea because a character needed to wear both gauntlets to get the power from them (really just my way of keeping Derek nerfed), but then Tik had the wonderful idea to turn one of the gauntlets into a magical prosthetic arm. It cost time and gold, but eventually, Derek was made whole again through Tik’s magic and ingenuity. 

Of course, the first thing the party did as soon as Derek had both arms back (and now a strength score of 19) was to undermine everything I did to nerf him, loading him up with better armor, weapons, and a shield. So much for me balancing the DNPC so he wouldn’t steal the spotlight. 

Le sigh. 

Now, there’s a very important plot point in my Tyranny of Dragons campaign that I haven’t shared is the details of one of the changes I had to make based on the additions I brought in to flesh out where the book was lacking. See, Tyranny of Dragons, originally Hoard of the Dragon Queen and Rise of Tiamat, were poorly written. They were the first campaign books of the edition, so there’s a little leeway there, but they were undoubtedly poorly written. To counter that, I developed the plotline into a war between fallen gods. 

There was a slot for godhood open, and Tiamat was gunning for it, but to have her go uncontested was something I couldn’t allow. So, why not bring Bhaal back into the fray? Not only were the players dealing with the Cult of the Dragon, but with the Cult of Bhaal as well. And with two gods vying for the same spot at godhood, there was only one logical solution. 

To make Derek a god. 

Obviously. 

DM.exe has stopped

So my players decided, rather than making any of themselves a god, they should make the DMPC a god. Which… I did not have the mental capacity for. So as any good little Critical Role fan at the time, meant bringing in the Raven Queen. Utilizing a city that had nothing but undead in it, the players found a temple to a forgotten god, one that had no followers and thus no power. In order to keep Derek from ascending to godhood (because what would he even be? Derek, god of stoicism?) I had him swear an oath to the Raven Queen, becoming her only paladin and champion. 

When the players learned about this, there was a collective groan at the table. Not because I gave Derek power… because I refused to let them make him a god.

They eventually relented and worked to take down both Bhaal and Tiamat, while establishing the Raven Queen in the open slot, helping Derek become the head of the paladins of her order, rather than the lone one. He had a good life after the campaign, and while I’m not sure the party ever forgave me from taking the great god Derek from them.