Will I Be Forgotten Reflection

Death is one of the hardest things to deal with in this world, mostly because we don’t really know anything about it. Biologically we know that the life processes stop, that the mind shuts down, and that the person is gone. Spiritually, we have more beliefs on what happens to the person, their mind, and/or their soul than we do people in this world, I’m sure. But the sheer number of people who fear death in this world all do for a variety of different reasons. 

Firstly, we have the fear of the unknown. We don’t know what happens to us after death. There are things that people believe, but knowing is a very different beast. If the people who believed in heaven knew that heaven was real, there wouldn’t be a single person of the faith that feared death in the slightest, but it is at the moment that death is about to take us that doubts begin to creep into our minds. The “what ifs” of our reality begin to sink in and we suddenly are a lot less sure of what’s on the other side. 

Second, we fear the pain of it. Death isn’t a pretty sight, not ever. Even the quiet scenes we see in movies where people pass ‘peacefully’ in their sleep are mere illusions. The body becomes too weak to fight even as we can no longer draw breath. It’s a terrifying and painful experience that we can only hope is dulled by the endorphins our minds release in a panicked frenzy to attempt to keep us alive even when no hope remains. 

Finally, dealing with mortality. While I’m sure there are dozens if not hundreds of reasons more to be afraid of death, this one I think affects more people than are willing to admit it. We as humans are constantly plagued by thoughts of our own mortality. Many animals, if not most, recognize that death isn’t just something that happens to others, that it is something that can happen to them, and they strive to live as long as they are able as long as it is comfortable for them to do so. 

Humans are terrifyingly different in this respect. We will cling to life, even when we know that we no longer are living well, because we deem life to be sacred… I’m kidding, we deem our life to be sacred. If we deemed all life to be sacred we wouldn’t be dropping bombs on schools or accepting bribes… I mean fundraising donations from lobbists… to protect the rights of gun manufacturers over the lives of those losing them. We wouldn’t be forgiving lethal force used on civilians, infants, unarmed non-combatants, the elderly… so on and so on. No, life isn’t sacred to us, but we cling to it all the same. 

Why? 

Is life so good that we need to hold onto the mortal coil until our fingers are pried off it by the Grim Reaper himself? No, it really isn’t. Especially at the age when we start realizing he’s coming for us. By then our bodies are shutting down, we can’t move under our own power, we start to lose our minds, and we sit in a small room being fed and changed like babies. And yet we cling on. 

Why?

Is it the indomitable human spirit? Maybe, but that seems unlikely. Is it a desire to continue to be with the ones we love? Doubtful, since many of them will also be gone by the time we reach this point, if we were even cognisant enough to recognize them anymore. Perhaps it’s the will of God, driving us to protect his gift to us? See above where we don’t seem to have a problem revoking his gift to others. 

Why?

Why, why, why?

Because we want to be immortal?

Now there’s an idea. And a fun one to look at in a game where you play immortals. See, in Vampire, you’re a young immortal, which means you have a very good chance at dying. This seems ironic, considering, but something that we need to realize here is that true, undying immortality is a curse beyond reckoning. 

No one, and I mean no one, would want to truly live forever. I can barely deal with Gen Alpha’s assault on the English Language, let alone have to live through generations of the bastardization of the language I speak. Yes, our language is a living and growing thing, but realize how obnoxious it is to have to learn new slang every year, imagine what that would look like to someone who’s been alive for a millennium. 

That’s just a minor inconvenience too. Think larger scale here, imagine for a moment, surviving to the end of the world. Humanity is gone, all life on earth is gone. You’re starving but can’t die, dehydrating, but can’t die, your body withering away… but can’t die. The earth is swallowed by the sun, your body hurled out into the vast expanse of space… freezing at absolute zero, drifting through a black void, eons before you knowing that you will be trapped alone with your own thoughts… and never able to die. 

Immortality is hell. 

But yet, we seek it, though not in its true form. 

We want to make our mark, we want to be remembered. We want the world to put us in the history books to be spoken of for the remainder of human existence, and perhaps beyond! 

And if we haven’t done that… we’re afraid. 

It's not death that we fear, it's being forgotten. If the things that we’ve done are forgotten, what was the point of doing them? If the people we love are forgotten, what was the point of their existence? Natalia is dealing with this exact issue with Lucious right now. Her sire’s work is unfinished, about to be destroyed by Marcus in a petty grab at power, and the immortality of a person she loves is in jeopardy because of it. 

She’s about to lose someone a second time, and she cannot imagine what the world will look like if that happens. 

See, death is far less terrifying to the person experiencing it than the people who will need to live on after they're gone. I always used to say, once someone is dead, their problems are over. Any pain they feel is gone, any suffering they’re experiencing is over, they don’t care about debts, they don’t care about money, they don’t care about politics… they’re done. It is those of us left behind in the wake of their death that carry on the pain and suffering of their passing. Worse yet, we’re left to face the world without them in it. We need to figure out what that world is going to look like and our place therein. We fear that the world will keep spinning, which it will, and eventually forget this person that meant so much to us, and perhaps we will also begin to forget them. And we know, we silently know, that one day, the same thing will happen to us. 

But if we could perform a great deed! Create something fantastic! Leave our mark on the world!...

Without looking it up: 

— Who built the Eiffel Tower?

— Who does the Sphinx memorialize?

— Who built your home?

You may know one or two of those, but I doubt you know all three. I doubt you even cared to know until I asked. These people, whose names I don’t know because I didn’t bother to look them up either, made something great. 

And they’re forgotten. 

Immortality is a farce that will never exist. As I said, one day the sun will swallow the earth, all evidence of humanity will be wiped from the universe if we’re not able to spread out among the stars before then. We will one day be forgotten. 

Like death, being forgotten is inevitable. 

So why do we fear it?

We live so far in the future that we fail to experience our own present. One day those people you love will be gone. Spend time with them now. Make the memories you’ll hold until your death, the treasure you’ll be buried with like the Pharaohs of old. Build a life worth living, not one worth remembering. If you don’t, then one day you’ll find yourself just like Natalia, desperately clinging to something you can never hold, and tearing yourself apart for failing at an impossible task. 

Will I forget you?

Not in my lifetime. 

Will you be forgotten?

One day, when we all meet our final death, when our name is spoken for the last time, and our image is lost to entropy. Then, we shall truly be free.