Translating Table Banter into Dialogue
Dialogue is one of the more difficult parts of writing. Just ask George Lucas. It’s coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere. Especially if you’re not careful. One of the hardest parts is talking like a person that you aren’t. I am not a twenty something year old woman, nor am I an eighty year old man, and I have never been either of those things (though, hopefully I’ll become one of them one day. I’ll let you guess which).
This was actually one of the most beneficial parts of writing this story the way I’m writing it: I am blessed with several other voices besides my own. In fairness, I still need to speak for the rest of the world, but most of the dialogue is going to take place with someone to bounce the conversation off of, rather than just sitting there and talking to myself like a madman.
There is one tragic downside to writing it this way: in game, sometimes the player characters don’t actually say what it is they want to say. There’s the option for the player to roll, say “well, I’m sure Smithers is more eloquent than I am, so let’s figure out what he says later,” and move on. This has actually happened several times. Or we’ll have an aside in a text chat or separate session to hash out what was said, and so other players don’t know the exact verbiage used at the time, meaning that parts of conversation are handwaved by being boiled down into generalizations. Still more frequently, we’ll have situations when players will have a conversation with each other, describing what they’re doing and thinking, and now I have to transition that from game play to the page.
Sometimes this is made even harder because the character they’re talking to had work that night, and couldn’t make the session, so we just kind of have to assume what they’d say in the situation.
For something I said was actually pretty easy, this is sounding harder and harder, isn’t it? Well, be that as it may, despite all the speed bumps between me and the final product, filling in the blanks of dialogue is actually pretty simple. Firstly, I have the great benefit of a meticulous notetaker. Behind the scenes, we actually record all our games together over Discord, this way Nicole has the option of listening back to it and transcribing it verbatim. This is usually added to her own handwritten notes, giving me an interesting perspective on how a player is seeing things unfold, not just my DM brain telling me what I think is happening in their heads.
Some people may be thinking: “but I don’t have my games recorded, or have the kind time or patience to listen back and transcribe notes.” And that is fair, but there are many other ways to take what is said at the table and turn it into something much more.
Extrapolation
“There’s two types of people in the world. There are those who can extrapolate from incomplete data.”
Extrapolation is key to building on incomplete dialogue. My players say things, allude to ideas, or make a note of how their character is feeling, and suddenly I am given an opportunity to build upon what was said.
“Luis says, ‘Do you really think you’ll get away with this?’ And anyone looking at him can see that he’s getting pissed off.”
Fair warning, this scene we’re about to work with is not something that has actually come from the notes, but is just a general idea that is believable enough. Luis has actually given me a great deal to work with in this hypothetical situation, despite it looks more like a generic hero line.
Firstly, he’s given me a mood to work with. Growing anger. Not full blown rage, but that growth, something I can build upon. Even better if the encounter becomes violent later. Rather than the sudden shift of a few lines to sudden assault, I can add in a few lines between the two of them, coaxing that anger out slowly, showing it build, creating a tit-for-tat that builds more drama.
“Do you really think you’ll get away with this?” Luis asked, his voice gaining an edge of anger as his eyes burned into the man before him.
(Here I get to take the original line, but dress it up with more of the mood Luis is creating.)
“Who’s going to stop me? You?” the villain laughed, his tone dismissive. A wicked smile curled back, revealing pointed teeth. “You’re welcome to try.”
(Did I have the villain say this? Probably not, but by adding this in, he’s prodding Luis, dismissing him and his power while also giving me a chance to explore his physicality more in a way that maybe didn’t come up in the original game session. He’s also offering a challenge, inviting the combat that is inevitably going to follow in the conversation based on the notes. If written verbatim, the combat would seem sudden, but extrapolating I can build a more natural connection.)
“You’re damn right, I am,” Luis said, gripping his sword tightly in his fist. With a roar of challenge, Luis lunged forward, his sword parallel to the ground, tip aimed straight at the villain's heart.
(Knowing Luis and his player as well as I do, I know that he’s not held to the standard of most knights to observe chivalry and proper etiquette. He’ll swear, he’ll attack first, he’ll do what is necessary to uphold his oath to Victory and claim it from any challenger. By adding in the ‘roar of challenge’ we see that this is what pushed him over the edge and started the fight, framing Luis in his characterization in a way that we don’t get from just the notes themselves.)
Internal Dialogue
One of my favorite things about first person perspective in novels is the chance to really get into the character’s head. One of my favorite book series, The Dresden Files by Jim Butcher, gives us the entire story from Harry’s perspective, and it is made clear immediately that he is an unreliable narrator. Now, anyone reading my novels will note that I am in fact writing them in third person, not first. I chose this because of how the perspective kept shifting from character to character, and it was just a lot easier for me to portray and for you as readers to keep up with the shifting tone. Writing it this way, however, removed my ability to delve into each character’s psyche the way I really wanted to.
This is rectified by taking small peeks into their minds through musings and reminisings, but also by having the chance to hear what the character is thinking. Sometimes at the table, the players will give me a “Well, right now Luis is feeling this way, and so he’s going to do this,” as a means of justifying an action they’re taking to the rest of the party. While the other characters are unaware of why Luis is acting the way he’s acting, the players understand it, and thus let him continue the scene without trying to interfere or interact, allowing him the spotlight in the moment.
“Luis recognizes this guy. He was one of the people who attacked the hospital that time. He doesn’t know his name, but he knows that face, so nothing the others say is going to get through to him right now.”
Okay, I can work with that. We take our original piece and add a bit more context with some internal dialogue.
“Do you really think you’ll get away with this?” Luis asked, his voice gaining an edge of anger as his eyes burned into the man before him. He could hear the others in the background, their voices overlapping, but their words meaning nothing to him in this moment.
I’ve seen him before, Luis thought to himself, and suddenly the memory came flooding back. The rain, the hospital. It’s that bastard who attacked the little girl. Patricia! He’s the one that got away!
“Who’s going to stop me? You?” the villain laughed, his tone dismissive. A wicked smile curled back, revealing pointed teeth. “You’re welcome to try.”
Try? Luis thought bitterly, his hand beginning to shake from how tightly his fingers were wrapped around the sword’s grip. This time I won’t try. This time I will succeed. Failure is not an option.
“You’re damn right, I am,” Luis said, gripping his sword tightly in his fist. With a roar of challenge, Luis lunged forward, his sword parallel to the ground, tip aimed straight at the villain's heart.
Now we’re starting to get somewhere. Framing Luis’ internal monologue with what he’s saying aloud expands what we’re able to understand about the scenario. It highlights what is important to him in this scene and justifies his actions to the audience as he’d done during the game to the other players.
Breakout Dialogue
Now this one is interesting because sometimes I have something to work with, whereas other times I just need to come up with something on the spot. This is where we break away from the current narrator of the story and do a quick aside with the characters that aren’t directly involved. They speak to each other, expressing their view on what’s happening in front of them, giving the audience just enough context to understand their position in the situation, without intruding on the predetermined actions that are happening in front of them.
Timm, for instance, was also at the hospital when this attack happened. Perhaps we can utilize him to help the other characters understand what’s going on:
“Wait! Luis!” Morgan cried out, trying to stop the knight before he could rush forward, but a strong hand gripped her arm.
“No,” Timm said, his own jaw set hard. “I know that face. That’s one of the men who tried to kill Patricia.”
Before Morgan could react, Timm lunged forward, and Luis soon found himself charging forward, not alone, but with an ally by his side. An ally who was equally furious with his target.
A grin began to stretch across his face.
Now, he thought to himself. Now victory was assured.
Filler Dialogue
Life sometimes happens and people miss sessions. This happens quite a lot with one particular player. This means I can either leave him completely out of the story, or I can fill in some dead air with something he would say. If I feel one particular character is dominating the conversation too much, or if an NPC who was feeding them information that the players weren’t fully understanding in real life, I can take the missing player’s character and have them cut in with questions, clarity, or even just a snarky comment to break the flow from monologue back to conversation. It probably isn’t necessary to create an example here, since this entire exercise is an example of filler dialogue as this particular scene never happened.
These are just a few tips and tricks I’ve used to spice up the scenes of my books a bit more than the game would have naturally provided. Is it perfect? Probably not, but it's a lot better than if I were to just write verbatim. Plus, what makes it more fun is the fact that it gives me the opportunity to put on the hat of what characters I’m working with in each chapter. Gives me a chance to really wear their minds and see the world the way they do. Dialogue is how we interact with the world and how characters can interact with us. Sometimes, both in life and in literature, it is a good opportunity to try out a different perspective. You’d be amazed how much it can alter your mind.
