Reflection: Blood of my Blood
Blood of my Blood was an interesting prompt for me to work on as Grey is really the blood of my own blood. I exaggerate his strengths and exaggerate his flaws (all of these being my own strengths and flaws). I’m not trying to be a jerk when I say that I’m pretty smart. Not rocket surgeon smart, but fairly intelligent and creative. When I’m studying things, I can usually piece things together and extrapolate pretty well. Unfortunately, that doesn’t translate to social situations well for me, so giving Grey the ability to piece together nuances in social dynamics was really just my way of portraying something that I wished for in myself rather than something I have the ability to do.
I’ve come a long way from when I was younger and thought that I was the smartest person in a room (something I made sure Grey would hold on to for me, at least for a little while), though his disdain for people in positions of power, especially those who abuse that power, is 100% me. Marcus and I wouldn’t get along in real life, and while there was no individual person who inspired Marcus, I can think of a few people who fit his description.
The two main dialogues in this chapter show the same flaw in Grey, but in two very different ways. That flaw, his blunt, direct nature that conveys disrespect and dismissal, is me to a fault. I’ve tried to get better with this, but I still struggle with it. I’m blunt, I’m direct, and oftentimes I’m just trying to convey something that I see as factual and logical without beating around the bush. Not because I don’t care how it makes other people feel, but because I don’t realize that it's going to have an effect on someone’s emotions when I’m saying it. Grey, however, is exceptionally aware of how his words are influencing others.
He knows full well what he’s doing to Diego as he pokes holes in the story he’s being fed about the noble Anarchs allowing freedom that the Camarilla denies. One side is clearly more evil than the other, but the evil is nearly identical in structure if not execution. Grey recognizes this and is willing to work within that system as he plots to change it. In order to do that, you need to get the people in that camp to realize that it isn’t all sunshine and rainbows, and there are things that need to be fixed, changed, or abandoned in order to make for a better future without turning into your enemy.
When Grey goes after Marcus, it is with a completely different intention. Here, he’s seeking humiliation. He knows it isn’t safe for him to speak out against someone with more power and resources than he has, but he does it anyway. This is also something I try to do as well, though I lack his eloquence and zingers. Speaking truth to power is important, because if we don’t we allow the power to rule unchecked and unchallenged, and when something is unchallenged, it begins to believe that it can do no wrong. This is especially true when any form of challenge is taken to be a blasphemy to their world view. When such a thing is done, people like Marcus begin to unravel, fueled by rage and self-righteousness that they are completely undeserving of.
So yeah, this entire chapter was kind of a metaphor of the American political hellscape that I’m trapped in at the moment. While we didn’t realize the scope of things at the time, my, and by extension Grey’s, belief that both sides are a problem, but you side with the lesser of the two evils while working to oust them both has only gotten stronger. I don’t plan to get too political here, but I think it’s pretty obvious which side is which in this particular instance.
Art, by its very nature, is political, because politics is, by definition, the art of debating and resolving conflict. One merely needs to look at the street art of Banksy to understand that art is a weapon against oppression. There is a reason why vampires are monsters, because that which dies in the light does not deserve to thrive in our societies. Beings that sustain themselves off the suffering of others, who trade in secrets and lies, and who prey on the weakest and least defended in our society are not worthy of being part of that society. I recognize that Grey is one of those monsters, but just as I said that I too choose to support a side in a broken system, it doesn’t mean I love that side any more than Grey loves his new vampiric self. Sometimes one needs to become a monster in order to slay monsters. The question is, will he be able to subsist in the world that comes after?
Also, if you think for a second that Grey or myself would ever support that orange turd, you’re as stupid as the people who think Monkey D. Luffy is a conservative.
